I always loved comics, but could never draw. I’ve tried working through this by improving my drawing skills, using legos, taking photos; none of which ever stuck.

I started reading Dinosaur Comics in mid-to-late 2006, and thought they were hilarious. Eventually, I learned that Ryan North, creator, was just like me: can’t draw. What he did, though, was gather some royalty-free clipart, organize it in some panels, and then BAM! Created Dinosaur Comics.

I, for one, thought this was awesome. I decided that as a creative exercise, I would do the same thing! So, I put together some clipart I found, and started creating some comics. This was during the summer of 2007.

It was such a fun creative exercise. I started linking my friends to the comics, and they enjoyed them. Eventually, I decided to put up a blog so that people could check for new comics easier, or subscribe to an E.I. RSS feed if they so desired.

Now, I’ve moved my blog over to wordpress. And that’s the tale thus far.

New comics are posted Monday through Friday, usually in the morning. How exciting!

Hope you enjoy the comics!

- Mike

Frequently Asked Questions!

Q: “Escalade Incompetency”? What’s with the name?

A: Escalade is the act of scaling walls with the aid of ladders. Since I can’t draw, I’m an incompetent artist. However, clipart has allowed me to overcome this obstacle, or “escalade” my “incompetency.” Get it?!?! I’m so witty!

Q: Why are the older comics more pixelated, and…umm…worse looking than how they are now?

A: The comic strips were originally created in good old Microsoft Paint. This meant I shrunk down the clipart and created the panels only using this artistic adonis of a program. Because of this, the strips were very pixelated and, well, pretty crappy looking.

Since, originally, EI started as me just wanting to make some comics for fun and mostly for myself, I didn’t feel it was necessary to make them look all that good–since this comic isn’t really about art, but rather the writing. As time went on I put them on a blog since my friends liked them, and then instead of me instant messaging or e-mailing them new ones, they could just check the site. When I switched over to WordPress, I felt it high time to use a higher quality program to make the comics. I painstakingly made sure though that all the ratios and character positions were exact to the way they started.

Q: When I look back, besides Mr. Tackles, Sandy, Sara, Andy, and Ted, I see a couple strips with two women blowing bubbles and drinking wine. What’s with that? Where did those characters go?

A: Originally I made four strips: the Mr. Tackles, Sandy, and Ted one, the Andy, Mr. Tackles, and Sara one, and then I made two others: one with a criminal pacing around in his cell, and one with two women blowing bubbles, drinking wine, and a third woman briefly walks by.

I never used the criminal one. I kept meaning to try him out, but I was always getting more ideas and developing the characters more for the regular EI gang we all know and love now. I ended up using the strip with the three women only twice. But as time went on, Escalade Incompetency started to become more about “the office characters,” so to speak–meaning Mr. Tackles, Sandy, Sara, Andy, and Ted. Eventually, I just stopped using the strips that didn’t contain those characters. I did, however, make a new strip layout: the one where Sandy and Sara are instant messaging each other.

Q: What are the characters’ last names? Why don’t you make a page where tell us a bit more about each character!

A: The only characters I ever gave last names to were Frank (Mr.) Tackles and Andy Martin. For a while I was going to have a bio-page of sorts that went into further detail about each character, but I then realized I’d have to write a lot more about each character’s background. I may end up doing this in the future, when all the characters are fleshed out pretty well, but at this current time, I like the characters developing more organically–meaning as each new comic comes out, maybe you’ll learn a bit more about the characters! I didn’t want to end up writing that, let’s say, Mr. Tackles has a twin brother named Cleetus, and then I think of a really funny idea that would need to make Mr. Tackles an only child, you know? So maybe in the future that page will exist, but for the time being you only gots the comics!

Q: Ok, fine. But I’m confused: I just recently started reading Escalade Incompetency, and I think Mr. Tackles is the boss. Why does he live in Ted’s basement? Does Andy work for Mr. Tackles? Who does Sara, Ted, and Sandy work for?

A: You’re right! Mr. Tackles is the CEO of the company.

Early on in the series, I had a comic where Sandy and Ted helped Mr. Tackles move into Ted’s basement after Tackles’s wife kicked him out. For the sake of continuity, I just always kept this as the case. Besides, I think it’s funnier if the crazy CEO of a company lived in another employee’s basement. Mr. Tackles clearly enjoys the bachelor life.

As for who works for whom, pretty much all you need to know is that Andy works for Mr. Tackles, and is also constantly being promoted, demoted, and having his job title changed by Tackles. Ted, the only character to call Mr. Tackles by his first name, Frank, is clearly pretty high up in the company too–since he was on a first name basis with the CEO even before the CEO lived in his basement. Sandy and Sara…hmm…I guess I’m not exactly sure who they directly report to. But, luckily, you can enjoy the comic with this still being vague. Who knows! Maybe someday this will all be cleared up.

Q: In some of the strips, I see some barely legible handwriting, which the characters seem to refer to as “Mike.” What’s up with that?

A: That’s me! Escalade Incompetency creator, Mike Goldense.

I got one of those computer-pen/pad things, and decided that after making such a weird purchase (for a guy whose handwriting is terrible and who can’t draw well at all), that I would put myself in EI!

So when you see sloppy handwriting, that’s my “character.” I can change things up in the cast and draw new stuff; or, I can just be another voice (of either reason or absurdity) in the rich tapestry that is this webcomic.

If you have any other questions, just shoot me an e-mail! or leave it as a comment here. I’ll get to answering them post-haste!